Saturday, February 8, 2014
A whole new world
Last week was about new beginnings. After eight years of mothering, both my birds flew the nest.
Those fuzzy days of naps, double prams, frighteningly early starts, Maisy books, sipper cups, soft rabbits that were never allowed to be washed, Bonds wonder suits, dummies, thumb sucking, swim nappies, sandpits and stick collections are fading into the distance as a new, vast world opens up.
My big bird moved up to the big school, at the top of three flights of stairs into the world of grade three. He disappeared into this safe and familiar world with barely a backward glance. He has friends who are happy to see him, a new teacher who probably knows him already and a routine that provides the predictable comfort that holidays never can.
My baby bird tiptoed into her new class, full of pride, excitement, a few nerves and only minor issues with the seams in her socks. While the teacher is new, the room and the teacher aide are like old friends she simply hasn't seen since she was two and visiting every day with her brother. And while she hasn't been there for three years, when I asked if she needed me to show her where the toilets were she scornfully told me that she remembered herself.
To have both your children happy at school is a miraculous gift for which I am very grateful. And for me, as I slowly exhale, it feels like maybe I can just sit down, enjoy a hot cup of tea and allow myself a moment of pride that we made it.
Parenting small children is immense, all encompassing, exhausting, miraculous, hilarious, relentless, incredible, magical and mostly involves much less sleep than I ever could have imagined. Parenting has taken my lofty ideals of the mother that I thought I would be, and scattered them with the winds. It has brought me to my knees, and then slowly built me back up again, stronger, wiser, humbler and endlessly grateful for small victories.
So, as one door closes, I am hit with a sprinkle of sadness, a dash of relief and a generous dollop of excitement that a new door is opening. It's a whole new year and I have lots of plans.
And this was my first finished project. My favourite vintage fabrics, mod podge and a Kvissle wall rack from Ikea. This is phase one of a grand plan to finally get organised.