Friday, November 1, 2013

Living the fantasy


Well girls, it appears I am living the fantasy. When Legoman dropped Liongirl off at kindy this morning, he re appeared with an envelope from one of the kindy mums, containing chocolate and this snipped out article from the weekend paper. Apparently scores of tired mothers the world over are fantasising about being just a bit sick, enough to require a short hospitalisation and recuperation in bed. If not that, well then a short stay in jail would be almost as good. Have a look here if you want to read this funny and very timely Frances Whiting article.

So please don't all hate me but it appears that I have made it. Overnight stay in hospital- check. Meals eaten and not prepared or cleaned up by me - total four. Enough drugs to make life all the more pleasant- check. Visits from people bringing flowers and gifts - two. Texts and calls from caring friends and family- numerous. Tasks I have performed in order to care for my family in the last two days - zero.

However, I must balance all the goodness out with a little bit of reality. My anaesthetist pointing out (just before the operation) that my plastic surgeon does in fact look like a butcher - mildly concerning. Suspicions that my bum may have been poking out the back of my hospital gown while they rolled me over to butcher operate on my leg - very concerning. Number of legs encased in very unattractive bandages and dvt preventing stockings- two. Number of feet with toes that look like fat german sausages- one. Number of steps able to be taken without tears in eyes- about seven ( thankfully the distance to the loo). Description of my scar and number of stitches involved from the surgeon - slightly worrying and probably good that I cannot see it yet ( it is currently sounding like my scar may resemble a large replica of the surgeons initials or a medium sized shark bite). Luckily I did not have midlife crisis aspirations to become a cancan dancer. Number of halloween fun nights enjoyed by my children that I could not participate in - one.

So now that I have discovered that I am living the fantasy, I feel it is my duty to all other mothers out there, to make make the most of it. There will be books read, crochet hooked, magazines perused, excess halloween treats consumed, and hopefully a whole back log of blog posts written. There will of course be enormous gratitude to kindy for taking miss Liongirl full time for a week or so, the girls at my work who are covering my missed days, my mum for taking time off work to help and to Legoman for stepping up to run the ship.

Amazing how many people it takes to cover just one mum when you think about it. Look after yourselves girls. Get that pap smear/ breast screen/skin check.

And then please share, have you had the hospital/jail fantasy?



I meant to start this post by saying thank you all for your words of support, stories of your own brushes with melanoma and other cancers, and general all round kindness on my last post. This bloggy community is just the best.

27 comments:

  1. I actually wished I had stayed in hospital after I had George.....you know, for a bit of a holiday. I always come home a couple of hours after delivering. If there is ever a next time, I'm going to book in for a week! Take care Mel xo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh yes, start planning a next time! mel x

      Delete
  2. I'm sorry. I had a laugh! Love this post. So true! Hope you are ok and on the mend!!
    www.lasscreative.com.au

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Do not be sorry Laura. I am living the dream remember!

      Delete
  3. The only time-off I've had in the past nine years were the 'holidays' at the Mater Hospital post c-section (and I've had four.) I sure did cherish those five days being waited on (and yes the drugs were good too!) Get well soon! xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh yes I've had two of those mater hotel experiences myself. Remember the cake trolley every afternoon, actually that is the only thing missing from this fantasy experience at home!

      Delete
    2. Those mater stays were my only 'holidays' away for 11 years until I had all the kids at school...! This has been a good year though as I've had 10 days away sans enfants and no pregnancies or hospital stays involved! Take it easy Mel. Hope you recovery goes smoothly. xx

      Delete
  4. Enjoy those drugs! And hope the pathology was all good. X

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Whoops totally forgot I had outstanding pathology! Having too much fun tripping out on gummy eyeballs and teeth from last nights halloween lolly haul. Actually, not expecting any left over melanoma in these newly chopped bits of my leg but they just like to be sure.

      Delete
  5. jail fantasy?!...oh girlfriend I may just make you blush!!!....how bout I just confess to enjoying just a little too much of the time spent in hospital post c section. Five whole fab days of being looked after....and drugs, lets say a big thank you to the drugs!. Sounds like you are livin the dream Mel....surely you could get an infection or something?....that could buy you a couple more weeks. Enjoy it while it lasts! x

    ReplyDelete
  6. Seems like we all have fond memories of the 5 day c section holiday. Unfortunately all good will is likely to evaporate if I'm out of action longer than a week or two so no infections thanks, I'll just be happy with a fantasy week!

    ReplyDelete
  7. You keep resting, popping those feet up and relaxing! It's amazing isn't it how many offers of help arrive when you most need them. Mr Bea and my friends have really stepped up to the mark when I've needed them! Take care sweetheart! :) x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, the school mums in particular have been wonderful. We have offers for pickups and playdates coming out of our ears. meld

      Delete
  8. Glad it all went well and that your friends and loved ones are caring for you so well, I hope that your recovery is speedy and that all results are good, you don't want to have to go back to the shark bite scar butcher surgeon!! Quite a description you gave there! Enjoy the choccie, but don't plan any visits to jail, they won't let you blog in there and we would miss you!! xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The surgeon really did look like a butcher, balding, slightly rotund, he just needed the stripy apron, a large meat cleaver and a roast slung over his shoulder. Kind of friendly and a little scary as a mental image just before you are put to sleep!

      Delete
  9. I'd bring you cake and gorgeous NZ wool and magazines if I lived closer! Look after yourself.
    Hospital fantasies ? Well I still remember my over night stay after getting my tonsils out in January and the roomie who insisted on multiple loud phone calls at midnight... Never mind about the rest of us in the room. Post op day 5/6 worst than my 3 c- sections ..

    ReplyDelete
  10. Oh thank you, cake and wool? You would have it covered. Oh you should have had more than one night for tonsils and day 5 is the low point, I remember when Roboboy had his out it all went pear shaped on day 5 and we were very grateful for good pain relief. Have heard it is worse for adults, hope your gang looked after you well. mel x

    ReplyDelete
  11. Ha ha...I know exactly how you feel! I had to get my appendix out when Toddler C was three months old and I was BEGGING for a general anaesthetic as I just wanted to sleep! I think that one hour of drug induced coma was enough to get me through the next year of not sleeping!
    The fun wore off of course after the first few days in hospital...by the third week in there it was a real drag! But definitely make the most of it! And be sure to take it slow and look after yourself! No need to rush back to reality...especially when family and friends have stepped up!
    And I am interested to know who your surgeon was? I have a guess but there may be more than one butcher in Brisbane! And I can assure you that no one in the operating theatres cares about your bottom...we see them all the time...it is part of our job and we honestly think nothing of it!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I've had 4 'holidays' in hospital after all the births. I'll never forget the nurse saying after Flynn was born, "well you'll probably need to get home to be with the rest of the family tomorrow". "Um, no, I'll be spending the maximum 5 days allowed on my health insurance thank you very much!". I also got to live the hospital fantasy earlier in the year when I had my gallbladder out - that was the best one because I was knocked out for the painful operation bit and had some rather fabulous drugs afterwards and not a single bit of pain - best sleep I'd had in years! In all serious, take good care of yourself, rest up and enjoy all everyone looking after you - it's times like these that makes you realise how wonderful some people are isn't it. Mel xxx

    ReplyDelete
  13. It's all so true! And perfectly timed after a major renovation and move! Enjoy the time-out. xox

    ReplyDelete
  14. I had carpal tunnel surgery on both my hands with a week between signing off one and having the next one done. 2 x 3 weeks off work in Feb/March - low season for me at work. Bliss! After a few days of miserable incapacity each time I was mostly swanning about bumping into work colleagues at the pub. I kept my sling for longer than was necessary as a prop and felt the need to show people my stitches to justify my absence from work (with accompanying 'poorly face').

    ReplyDelete
  15. Don't worry about the scar. I have a huge scar from a surgery many years ago, but every time my kids and Husband see it, they know that Mum is still here with them, thankfully because of that scar. Take it easy xx.

    ReplyDelete
  16. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hello lovely down under lady. Just read back to see your tales and so I'm sorry and glad for you all in one go. Not great thing to have to face at all, but I'm so glad you did and the recuperation bit is a mixed bag of good and bad too isn't it. I'm sure you're not feeling it all the time, but your ironic humour shines through and probably helps you cope with most stuff I'm sure. Now I have a mole I've wondered about so I think you might have forced me to pull my head out of the sand with you realities. I only thought the other day that as great as my man is, he'd be absolutely pants at running our family life without me. Your article tunes in to a thought I was having staring out the kitchen window the other day. I listed in my head every blinking job I do that people used to get paid for in grand houses plus all the other stuff modern working women have. Phew no wonder I get a bit hissy when pants don't quite make it into the laundy basket, but stay by the bed. Despite the need for that rest seems mums don't get it without a major plan before hand, a bit of guilt chucked in and knowing there'll be loads of crap to clear up afterwards. Keep sane and I look forward to seeing you up and about showing us more of your lovely home.
    Lisa X

    ReplyDelete
  18. You're right it does take a village to raise a child when one mum is down in action! We had six months of meals and flowers and visits and they hung in their till the end. Amazing!.My favourite lie downs were also post babies. It may be the reason I had five children in fact. I scored a full ten days with the twins and there weren't even others home then. he sleep though....! Even last year as they were explaining the anaesthetic to me the last thing I said was "Just knock me out and let me get some sleep!"

    ReplyDelete
  19. I'm really glad to hear you're out of surgery and recovering at home. It's so funny that your time to just sit is such a novelty that you're analysing it! But that's how it is for mums. Dads too, but mainly mums. I like what you said about how many people have to step in and rally round when one woman is ill. Bless them all, you've got a loving and supportive community there for you by the sound of it. Take care and continue to get better lovely lady. xx

    ReplyDelete
  20. mel this is so funny. i was in bed sick for 3 days last school hols and even tho i felt like complete and utter crap i slept and read books guilt free. sure the place fell down around me but i think it was worth a little rest.

    ReplyDelete